Dear Anna - Last week I was writing the date and it occurred to me that four months ago, you had just been born. Even since your mom wrote in December, you've grown and learned so much: like now you can roll over! We put you down on the bed one day and before we had time to think about it, you ever-so-nonchalantly flipped up on to your side and over. It was like you had been practicing in secret just waiting for the moment to debut your new skill. We were amazed; well done!
Your first Christmas holiday held lots of memorable events. Uncle Luke was able to get time off from the Air Force and flew home to spend three weeks at Grandma and Grandpa's house. When he first held you, it was at arm's length with the mildly-panicked and fascinated what-if-she-breaks-or-worse-yet-poops face, but in no time he was holding you up and moving you around and you were smiling right back at him.
Our trip to Houghton yielded more introductions: Barb and Jon Arensen. Aunt Barb took to you right away, and even Uncle Jon asked to hold you, though with the caveat that if you started to poop he would "chuck" you back to us. Thankfully you heeded his warning and he happily held you without incident.
Mom took you in to see the doctor for your second round of vaccinations. You were exceedingly happy to meet the doctor and sat in Mom's arms cooing warmly. As that needle plunged into your thigh, Mom says your face immediately changed. "How could you DO that to me?!" your teary eyes begged. And speaking of teary eyes, there's something else that's new - your eyes actually tear up when you cry (which is not all that often to be honest). After that visit, the doctor was so impressed with your growth, he said that we can start feeding you SOLID foods, though we think that we may delay that until after you return from your big trip to Taiwan and the Philippines, because that will make it much easier to travel with you! We applied for and received your passport this month, confirming that you will be making your first international journey outside the womb to go visit Ankong, Lola, and all the rest of the Brions and Lao(hoo)s in March. I took your passport photo myself while you were lying on the bed.
Grandma and Grandpa were just here visiting this afternoon. They get to see you every week or two, either when we visit them or they come here to see you. Today you were a little bit out of sorts, since your nose is all stuffy and you didn’t sleep well last night, but I know that Grandma and Grandpa love every minute that they get to spend with you, even when you’re not happy. Grandpa is still hoping that he is your first word.
I like to rough-house with you. We have a couple of tricks: sometimes I hold you up over my head with one hand like you’re an airplane flying around and other times I hold you upright in the palm of one hand, then I slowly let you fall down and backwards before catching you and nuzzling your belly. You LOVE that.
Your mom and I have noticed that when you are content, sometimes the easiest way to make you squeal with glee is to squeeze and hold you tightly next to us while pretending to nibble on your ears, toes, or other exposed extremities. And sometimes we whisper one of our favorite lines from Where the Wild Things Are, "I'll eat you up, I love you so!"
Four Months
Sunday, January 25, 2009
Lola's visit
Thursday, October 30, 2008
Anna, I hope that one day you realize just how much your grandparents love you.
Your Lola visited us for almost three weeks, and she pretty much held you the entire time. She kept saying that being a grandma is so much more fun than being a mother, but I'm thinking that it's probably more fun being a grandchild, too. (You certainly got more cuddle time and yeah, more frequent diaper changes. :)
We miss your Lola already, and I know she misses you.
(Sorry, Anna, the bottom picture isn't the most flattering of you, but your Lola sure doesn't look like she could be a grandma, huh?)
One Month milestones
Wednesday, October 29, 2008
Anna
- was born
- "sunbathed" (day 2)
- got named (day 3)
- smiled (day 3)
- "laughed" (week 1)
- lost her umbilical cord stump (week 2.5)
- went through a growth spurt (woke mommy up every hour or so) (week 2.5)
- visited Houghton! (week 3)
- graduated from newborn diapers to size 1! (week 3.5)
- fit into a front carrier (week 4)
One month
Friday, October 17, 2008
I had been meaning to write you a monthly letter, Anna, and it is telling that you are now exactly five weeks old and I am just now sitting down to do this. Not necessarily an auspicious beginning to what I hope will continue in the passing months, but oh well.
So yes! You are five weeks old at this exact moment. Enough time has passed that the details of your birth are less vivid (painful?), but it has not been so long that I do not remember the overwhelming sense of the impossible that overcame me when the pushing and groaning were over and I saw you for the first time.
How in the world did we create a human being? How in the world are you truly ours? These are questions your dad and I ponder in the quiet moments between diaper changes. In other words, even as we quickly become accustomed to the daily rituals of caring for a newborn, we still have moments when the incredulity of this miracle is overwhelming.
As I write, you are in your Pack n' Play about four feet away from me. Four feet that seems like a ridiculous distance when your cries wake me up at night. Even though it is after three in the morning, you are wide awake and I can see you peering my direction through the mesh of the crib. You have decided that daytime is for sleeping and night time is for playing, so I have spent the better part of the night convincing myself that you are sated enough with milk to go back to bed only to have to get up minutes later when you decide that you are either still hungry or maybe just bored.
Just now, your pacifier fell out of your mouth and you let out a cry. I finally picked you up and moved you to my place in bed beside your dad, where you are within an arm's reach and you can maybe be lulled to sleep by your dad's snores (ha ha). This use of a pacifier is evidence of how the reality of parenting is such that one must choose which ideals are worth the inconvenience, and which are worth sacrificing just to get through the day. (Hmm, that makes me think of the upcoming election...) I was sure I wouldn't use a pacifier to, well, pacify you, but I've discovered that it is sometimes a lot easier to provide a pacifier than to BE a pacifier. As my dear friend Hannah said, "You can't ruin your baby in one night." This has been a comfort on the several nights we've relied on a pacifier and on the bleary-eyed moments when I decide to put off a nappy change.
Some things I don't want to forget: the way we can hear your "voice" when you sneeze; the wrinkled forehead/puckered lip combination that appears for a few seconds after each feeding; your "piston" legs; the squeaks and grunts you let out in your sleep. I can't even count the number of strangers who have given the same unsolicited advice: "Savor this time because it will be gone in the blink of an eye." You will never be this tiny again! And as much as we look forward to a more, hmm, interactive version of you, part of me is already mourning the fact that you seem to be morphing and growing before our eyes. Maybe those are just the post-natal hormones that are still raging but it is hard not to be sentimental when we see other babies and realize that in a month or two, you will be completely different. This thought helps keep me sane and loving when your desperate cries (which seem so pathetic and quiet in the daytime) wake me up for the umpteenth time in the middle of the night. As hard as it is for me to believe, these days will soon be gone.
So tonight, at least, I'll willingly see this lack of sleep as a small price to pay for more opportunities to savor you, just as you are, my teeny tiny little girl.
We love you, Anna.
Your mom
One month ago today
Thursday, October 9, 2008
Exactly four weeks ago, I went to the doctor for what I thought would be a routine check-up. Instead of the fifteen minute appointment I had expected, I ended up being admitted to the hospital. A mere 12 hours later, Anna Brion Lao Shaffner was born!
Not only was Anna born four weeks ago, but today was supposed to be her due date. We are so happy you came early, Anna! We already can't imagine our lives without you!
Anna entering the world
